The Importance of Grief, Voices, and Names

As I was reading the lesson in Come, Follow Me a few weeks ago, I was struck by something that I hadn't thought about before. Well, at least not within this context. It's a two part thought, and it came to me as I was pondering the account of Christ showing Himself to Mary Magdalene in the garden as she is overcome with emotion.

Before I continue with my new thought, I just have to say that it has always been an amazing blessing in my life to know that God and our Savior value women just as much as men. We are all equally important to them. I am so grateful for scriptural accounts that help me understand this, such as the account of this sacred moment in the garden immediately following our Savior's return to earth in His resurrected form.

I have always been able to relate to Mary Magdalene's feelings. She felt so overcome with grief because of the love she had for our Savior. I cannot imagine coming to the tomb to complete the rituals of your faith and finding the body of a beloved one gone. Even with the angels' account, even with their words meant to comfort, I still understand her grief.

I believe that families can be forever. That, when we make covenants with the Lord and keep them, we will be crowned with glory in the next life and continue the loving relationships we have on this earth. This gives me hope. But it doesn't negate grief. And I don't believe our Father in Heaven meant it to. Grief is an expression of extreme love and gratitude for the life of a person that has been such a large part of our own. It is the way we honor those we lose. 

We can continue on with our lives, but that love does stay with us, sometimes in an overwhelming way that sometimes brings us to tears when we hear a song, smell something that reminds us of the person, or see a photo/picture of them. This is why I love the story of Mary Magdalene in the garden. She was not afraid to show her grief because of the love she has for our Savior.

So, now comes my *NEW*-ish two-part thought. The first thought is this--will I recognize the voice of my Savior, even in grief? At first, Mary did not. I don't judge her for that. I do the SAME THING when I am in a place of grief. But she didn't tell the Savior to leave. Instead, she asked for help, or rather, asked if He knew how to help her by giving her information. She wanted to make things right in her grief, and I love her for that. Even though she didn't recognize His voice immediately, she was willing to ask for help.

Now, the second part of my thought. How will the Savior say my name when I see Him? How will Heavenly Father say my name when I see Him? Will they say it lovingly in disappointment, or lovingly in happiness? You see, Christ says Mary's name in a way that is loving. I believe the Savior and our Father always speak our names lovingly. But, I also know that, based on our actions, we will be judged after this life. So, how do I want my name to be said? Lovingly in disappointment, or lovingly in happiness and celebration for a life well lived?

Writing that also makes me think about the way I say other people's names. Am I emulating my Savior and Heavenly Father and speaking names in a loving way, or do I speak names in derision and anger? Yep, I need to work on that!

I love this story. I love that Christ chose to appear to a woman before anyone else. I love that she recognized Him because of the way He said her name. I hope to have that experience one day.

Thank you so much for taking the time to stop by and read my thoughts! My goal is to write something each week. Sometimes it will be shorter, sometimes longer. Sometimes I won't write, and that will be ok. :) I hope that you feel our Savior's love for you! He is there, even when we feel He's not. Remember, that's our grief getting in the way. Don't let it!

Crying

Photo source.

I deal with a lot of crying in my line of work.  I work with children who have severe mental disabilities.  Their inability to communicate makes for some sad days and some hard lessons for them AND me, too.  It's such a rewarding job, though, and I have learned SO MUCH about the Atonement of our Savior as I've worked with these amazing kids.

So, anyway, back to crying.  We had a day where it seemed like there was non-stop crying going on in our class last week.  It was enough to drive someone mad.  I can't say for 100% certain why this child was crying, but it got me thinking about our Father in Heaven and why/when we cry to Him in prayer.  His responses make so much more sense to me as I've worked with children and been in a "parenting" role.  I'd like to share my thoughts about this with you.  I'll relate situations that have happened in my experience and then a parable of how this relates to our relationship with God as our Father.

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Situation #1: A child falls down, or is pushed down, or comes to harm in a way that is definitely not his fault.  We immediately run to the child to help them and comfort them.  Sometimes the child pushes us away or thinks they don't need us.  We still try to help them.  Sometimes the child rushes into our arms and sobs.  We allow them to calm down and help them up again.

Parable #1: Something happens in our life that  is not our fault and we get hurt--physically, emotionally, or spiritually.  We can either shun God's help and not ask Him for help (He still will try to reach out to us) or we can rush to Him in prayer and receive strength as we feel of His love.  The choice is ours.

Situation #2: A child is doing something that could hurt him unwittingly.  You tell the child to stop--he will get hurt if the behavior continues.  The child stops and we praise him.  OR, the child doesn't stop, gets hurt, and we are less quick to comfort him.

Parable #2  We are doing something that God does not approve of.  He gently chastens us to help us understand that our behavior is not worthy of a child of God.  We stop and repent--He blesses us.  OR, we don't stop and we cut ourselves off from the blessings of the Lord.

Situation #3: A child is doing something that they KNOW is wrong.  They get hurt.  We don't seem to have much sympathy for this child's crying as they knew that what they were doing was wrong.  We do not rush to their aid.  However, because we love them and they are our child, we counsel them about what they did wrong and why it is that they are unhappy.  We encourage them not to do it again.

Parable #3: We are intentionally sinning.  God cannot dwell in unholy places.  He puts warnings in place to help us to change our ways.  He sends guidance from scriptures, living prophets and church leaders.  He lets us feel sorrow in hope that this sorrow will bring us back to Him.

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I guess that I could go on and have a situation/parable about continually doing things that are harmful to us, but I think you get my drift.  So, I hope that you can see a little bit of God in your everyday life!  He is all around us and He loves us.  He is our Father and wants what is best for us.  I've recently started taking a deeper look at my life and am changing things that are not right.  Because I know that we are all human and all have things to change, I encourage you to pray and ask our Father what it is He would have you change.  I promise you'll be much happier if you take His advice!