Choose to Believe

I have been thinking a lot about the ability to choose. I firmly believe that people are born with the ability to choose and that we can make choices to help us become happy, no matter our circumstances. This is a gift from our Father in Heaven. We learn how to choose correctly by making choices at an early age and learning from low-stakes mistakes made by those choices. Without the ability to choose, we are objects being acted upon instead of capable human beings who have the power to make decisions.

I love that the Spirit can guide me to more information to help me perfect my belief and knowledge about this agency that has been given to me. This week's talk is called "Choose to Believe" and was given by L. Whitney Clayton back in April of 2015. As I read, I realized that I have to DAILY  choose to believe in Christ, in the Father's Plan, in the power of the Holy Ghost, and in my own abilities in order to become the person that I am meant to be.

Each of us will go through difficult times. There will always be a trial just around the corner. If we choose to believe, we are choosing hope, and with that hope will come peace. May each of us choose to believe in the all-knowing and all-loving power of God, the Eternal Father, and His Son, Jesus Christ, each day is my prayer. Have a beautiful week, friends!

Sunday Sustenance

Those of you who follow me on Facebook (my real profile, not this blog's page) know that I have been going through some health issues.  As I write this, they still haven't been resolved, but I do know that the health issues I've had over the past years have strengthened my testimony of the Savior.  It ties into this week's Sunday Sustenance, so let's get to it!

The Living Christ: In my living room, there is a framed copy of this document with a painting of the Savior next to it.  As I have pondered my situation the past few weeks, I have seriously thought about the Savior and what He went through for us.  I realized that there was no one here on earth that He could truly count on.  He was surrounded by mortal men who did not fully understand what He was going through.  His only true support was the Father.  No wonder our Father was anguished as the Savior bled for us in Gethsemane and the Spirit had to leave for a time.  As I've sat in the chair in my living room, often in pain, often tired and weary, I see the painting of my Savior.  I am so grateful that He will never leave me, that the Father will never leave me, that my Savior has suffered in the exact same way that I have.  Knowing that there is someone who literally knows what I am going through and will not judge me, but will only show compassion towards me, has saved me many times.  The only times that our Savior and our Father leave us are when we do the walking away.  The only way that the Savior and our Father can help us is through the hands of those around us.  I have been very blessed with good friends who have done this the past few weeks.

True Faith: This meme really helped me get through some of the issues I've had to decide this week.  I am confident that I can do what the Lord asks of me, even if it's not my plan for me.

The Lesson of the Saggy Burrito in My Pants: Okay, this isn't so much "uplifting" as it was needed to help me know that there are others in the world that semi-know what I'm going through.  Needless to say, my issues do deal with bleeding and hemorrhaging, so this article came through and gave me a good chuckle, and a feeling that perhaps the internet can teach people something. ;)  I apologize now if there is any profanity in the article, I wasn't paying that much attention as I read it, I just needed to do so and am glad I did.

Mrs. Dalloway @ Aunt Peaches: Aunt Peaches is one of my favorite blogs.  I don't always agree with her opinions, but I DO always learn something when I visit her.  This post was eye opening, and led me to be more open about the health issues I have quite frequently, as well as try to resolve issues that have been left to fester.  It also helped me to love Aunt Peaches even more as a person and as my sister, whether I agree with her all the time or not.  We can't always agree with everything everyone says...that would be boring!  Perhaps I'll do a 5 Things I'm Afraid To Tell You someday, but that day is not today.

I think that's all for this week.  I know only one is "religious" so to speak, but I do know that God's hand is in my life and led me this week to the things I needed so I could have the sustenance to make it through.  I'll be back next week (hopefully) with more links for you! :)  Have a peaceful Sabbath and a Spirit filled week, all!

Sunday Sustenance

Yep, two weeks in a row! ;)  Let's get to this week's list of good news.

The Hope of God's Light: This simple story, told by a fallible human like me, strengthened my testimony that God lives and loves each of His children.  This man's journey to know God is amazing.

Matthew 11:30: A reminder of the willingness of our Savior to carry burdens too heavy for our shoulders.

How Far Can You Get On Kindness: This story has restored my faith in humanity.

I'll be back (fingers crossed) next week with more inspiration! :)

Sunday Sustenance

I've decided, yet again, to be more proactive about my journaling here. ;)  So, I'm attempting something new, and I'm calling it "Sunday Sustenance".  I will make a list of things I have found that have uplifted me through the week and add them each week.  Who know how long each list will be, it is a mystery to even myself!  Enjoy!

The Comforter: A talk from the past General Conference by President Eyring that made me feel like someone understood.  It is like he looked into my heart and spoke the words found there about why it is IMPERATIVE that we serve those around us.

Students Recoginze That ALL Have Worth: Even the school janitor likes to be recognized as important.  Each job is important--the amount of money you make is not.  Without each other, the world would go nuts!

Going back to the first one: This story about a police officer who went FAR above and beyond the call of duty...or did he?  Love this one!

I'm sure there are more, these are just ones that impacted me to the point of remembrance.  I'll (fingers crossed) be back next week with more! :)

His Grace: 2 in 1 Post

Hello again.  Here is a pair of prints for you all--the same print, but with two different POPS of color.  This is one of my favorite quotes from the past April 2015 General Conference.

Which do you like better?  Orange, or pink?  Please feel free to print this and use it for PERSONAL USE only.  If you'd like a watermark free version, please email me and we can work something out.  For more copyright and disclaimer information, see the tab up top!  Enjoy!

Forgiveness: The World vs. The Lord

"And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace 

of them that make peace."

~James 3:18

This past week in Sunday School we were having a discussion about Joseph in Egypt (one of my all time favorite stories) in the book of Genesis and an interesting thing happened to me.  This question was raised: How does the worlds belief about forgiveness differ from the Lord's belief about forgiveness?

I raised my hand.  I thought I knew what to say.  Instead, I said something completely different.  It was like I was just saying things that were there and I hadn't realized it.  I'd like to share it with you and then, at the end, I've included the information as a table for study. :)

I had three points from each side that contrast each other come spilling out of my mouth.  I didn't go in depth, I just stated, "The world says that someone has to ask forgiveness.  The Lord tells us they do not need to in order for you to forgive.  The world tells you that someone has to make things perfectly whole and right again.  The Lords invites us to see that He already has.  The world tells you if the offense is committed again, you don't have to forgive them a second time.  The Lord tells us seventy times seven."  I'd like to delve a bit deeper into these points.

1)  The world says that someone has to ask forgiveness before you can forgive.  The Lord does not agree.  He says you can forgive even without an apology.  Let's take a look at some examples of this in the scriptures.  In Doctrine & Covenants 64:10, the Lord tell us, "I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men." (emphasis added)  There is not qualifier in that statement from the Lord.  All literally means all, whether they have apologized or not.  Another example of this can be found at the end of our Savior's life.  As Jesus was hanging on the cross, suffering for each one of us and the sins that we so frequently commit, He spoke these words to His Father (who is our Father as well), "Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do..." (Luke 23:24).  If you read prior to this statement, you will find no apology, either sincere or snide, from those who harmed Him.  The Savior expects us to live by His example.  This means that we are held to a higher standard.  We must forgive all men, as He did, no matter what they do and whether or not there is an apology.

2)  The world says that the person has to make things right.  It tells us that if things aren't made right, we will never be whole and will be unable to find peace.  The Lord tells us He already has made things right and that we can find complete peace in a world that rarely feels a moment of it.  Some scriptural back up for my point--in Doctrine & Covenants 50:41-42 reads, "Fear not, little children, for you are mine, and I have overcome the world, and you are of them that my Father hath given me; And none of them that my Father hath given me shall be lost."  A powerful promise. Christ teaches in Matthew 11:29-30, "Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly of heart; and ye shall find rest unto your souls.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."  And in John 14:27 we learn this from the Savior, "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you.  Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."  When we follow Christ's example of ready forgiveness, all is right.  Our burdens are lifted. We find peace.

3)  The world would tell us that if we forgive once, and the offense is committed against us again, it is unforgivable.  The Lord has very different math.  Peter asked this of the Lord in Matthew 18:21, "Then came Peter unto him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?"  I think we all know the response.  Matthew 18:22, "Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven."  I will put a short disclaimer in here and say that we are agents to act and not be acted upon (see HERE, especially under Component Number Three: Inviting Children to Act for more on that subject).  Whenever we are in a situation where we are being continually hurt, we must shoulder some of the blame and work to not put ourselves in that situation.  This may be radical thinking, but even those who are in serious abusive situations have the power to leave.  Christ will bolster you.  He will carry you.  Take action.  The only instance I feel this does not apply to is when a child or some other frail person who is unable to care for themselves and is completely dependent upon another for life is being abused.

I'm not here to say that I am the perfect example of forgiveness or the perfect example of righteous living.  I am just here to share with you a little knowledge that I learned in Sunday School this past Sabbath.  I personally have had experiences with each of these three items of concern.  I also have come to know that the Savior's Atonement will make up for all that I lack and for all that is done to me in error.  

I also believe what we are taught about judgement and forgiveness (see HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, and HERE.)  When we forgive freely and without malice, frankly as Nephi did, we are becoming more like our Savior and more fit for the Kingdom of God.  I know that forgiveness is part of Christ like charity.

May we ever forgive those around us so that our lives may be filled with peace is my humble desire and wish.  God bless you all!

You can find the chart I told you about HERE.  Feel free to download it and use it for your personal use.  If you find any other wonderful scriptures, I would LOVE to have you share them here in the comments!

BIG Post: Veggies!

Well, all, it is that time of the week again!  Time to share our positive thoughts from this week!  You'll notice that the link is gone this week.  I've also decided that next week we will not be having a BIG (BUTs in Gear) post, but that we will start again on the first Friday of March and the link will be gone--I just want to see your comments and I'll keep the March post at the top of the blog all month long for you to add comments to! :)  This just makes things easier on me as I've got some other things in the works that need to be taken care of first and foremost. I hope you understand!

Okay, so this is what I did a little bit differently this week.  I ate better!  It was something that wasn't too hard for me, but I had noticed that I was slipping into some of my old bad eating habits and so I tried to nip those in the bud.  And do you know what?  I felt SO MUCH BETTER.  SO much better...and I was able to be more productive and happy.  I was able to let things slide instead of dwelling on things I can't change--which is the biggest issue I have at times.  It was marvelous! :)  Getting your daily fruit and veg and nutrients really makes a difference!  I bet I'm preachin' to the choir here...

So, what do you have for me this week?  Comment below--I love hearing what you've been doing to be a little bit happier and more positive each day!  HUGS to you all!

Getting Our BUTs in Gear 2014

Hi, friends!  I'm back and I'm hoping the share this post so much and get so many people on board with this idea that I've had that there will be no print, just words and an invitation today. :)

This year has started less than stellar.  My goal has been to focus more on the positive in 2014 and I think God is trying me mightily--He wants to see if I am serious.  And since I am, I've had an idea growing inside of me.  I hope that it is something that each of you will consider doing along with me so that we can strengthen one another as women.  And I guess men are more than welcome to join as well. ;)

So, as I've struggled the last week through the second illness of the year, I had a thought come to my mind.  I had been watching this video about girls who were participants, along with their mothers, in a study of what beauty is.  I was incredibly saddened as I listened to girls talk about things that had been said to them and women talk about issues they didn't want to perpetuate in their daughters.  The end up having this amazing photo gallery where people come and write nice things on their undoctored "selfie" shots. It was nice.  Why can't we be like that all the time?  Genuinely kind in our comments?

Then I watched this video about women who have overcome different life trials and want to seek the good.  Could I be the same as woman #2 who really couldn't brag about myself for a minute?  Hmmm...

Lastly, I watched the video below.  I love the message and I knew I needed to be reclaimed...



I started thinking about how I self talk.  You know, what you say about yourself.  I am really proud of some of the things I accomplish, but I don't always admit it to myself and I rarely share good news with anyone beside my husband.  Sometimes my family and a few close friends, but now very many people.  Isn't that a shame?!  What an opportunity to share with others how good God is to me and how He has blessed my life!  What a selfish way to thank Him.  I also thought about all the unkind things I internalize on a daily, hourly, sometimes minute by minute basis and realized that it was the same selfishness.  I am a daughter of God.  He made me.  He loves me.  And I am enough as I try daily to better myself.  I need to share that more, too!

After that, I started thinking about how my attitude towards myself is reflected in how I view others.  I realized that I will grudgingly allow certain people their "one good quality" and then list in my mind all the things I dislike about them at times.  I'm sure you've done it, too.  If not, good for you!  PLEASE JOIN THIS--I need your help!  It's time for me to get my BUTs in gear.

Here's an example of what I'm talking about.  I don't particularly like everything that everyone around me does all the time.  But guess what, we're human, right?  Well, I've gotten into this habit of saying things like, "Well I know she helps in such and such a way, BUT ALL THESE BAD THINGS SHE DID (to me or others) DON'T BALANCE THAT 'one good quality' OUT."

Hmmm...judging.  Yep.  THAT IS JUDGING.  And it is NOT ok.  What if, instead, when someone did something HUMAN (like I do, right), I said, "She did this bad thing that I don't like, BUT she does all these good things!"  That sounds so much nicer.  And so much more positive!

My goal is to eventually get rid of BUTs and only see the good.  It will be hard.  If this month has proven anything to me, IT WILL BE HARD.  BUT (this is a good one of those), I think it will be worth it.  I've learned that the hardest things I've done have been the most rewarding.

So, here's my invitation to you.  Join me!  Each Friday, I'll add a linky to my BUTs post where you can add a story or short post, or whatever you like from anywhere you can link from that will encourage us to get our BUTs in gear.  It could be a story on how you learned to love yourself that week.  Or you child(ren), or someone around you.  Husband love!  Neighbor love!  EVERYONE love!  Let's get our lives reclaimed by God so that His love can shine through us and we can be a power for GOOD in a world that so desperately needs it!

I hope you join me!  If you'd like to, please add a link to your blog or other online presence below so that I can leave you some love!  I want to make this HUGE, so please grab the blog badge up top and add it to your blog--it should be linked back to here, but if not, let me know  Let's get our BUTs in gear in 2014, all!

I'll be back on Friday with by first BIG (BUTs in Gear) post!  Hope you join me again then! :)

I'm linking this up with: Time Warp Wife, Growing Home: Teach Me Tuesday, Titus 2 Tuesday, Wise Woman Link Up.

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Small & Simple

Hi all!  I know it's been a super long time since I posted on here, but I've been busy.  I've been busy trying to simplify my life.  I want to get back to basics, do the things I need to do first (spiritual study/prayer), the things I have to do next (housework), the things I want to do (crafting, etc.), and then I can do the things that I don't have an enormous amount of responsibility for.  Unfortunately, this blog is categorized under the last one...not because I don't want to share, but because I would rather share face to face and so I've been out doing more of that! :)

Tonight I was scrolling down Facebook (the later category...although housework isn't 100% done...oops!) and I saw a post from Elder Bednar about keeping things simple.  PERFECT!

Here's the clip~

So, I made a print to display in my home as a reminder to keep things small and simple.  And then I thought YOU'D like to display one too perhaps!  So I've done up all sorts of colors and hopefully one works for you!

Here they are~

Just click to enlarge then right click and save!  Please feel free to use these FOR PERSONAL USE ONLY.  For more disclaimers and printing policies, please see the tab up top!  Happy printing!!!

You Got This

I've been having a little bit of a rough time lately.  I won't go into details as I'm working on it and I'm trying to stay positive, but I needed to do something to remind myself that I'm okay.  Hence the print I'm about to share...

Here it is~

I've used a freebie digi from the Neare Store (scroll down...something is wrong with their blog code) and other digi elements by Carrie Stephens ("trim" in between the two patterned "wall papers"), and two free patterned papers I've picked up from somewhere (sorry!).

It's really hard to try and keep it all together in a world where it seems like nearly everyone else has it together.  I know that isn't technically true, but sometimes I just need a reminder that I, too, can appear to have it together.  And maybe if I keep faking it, I'll actually BE it!  Who knows.  We'll see.  Hopefully you can use this reminder as well!

Please feel free to use this print FOR PERSONAL USE ONLY.  For other disclaimers and printing policies, please see the tab up top!  Just left click, right click, save, and print!  This print is 4" x 6" so it would also be okay to send it somewhere to get prints made! :)  Hopefully it can help someone other than myself...

HUGS friends!

Finding Beauty

Well, I hope you liked my DT post last week for Inkspirational because I've got another one for you this week, lol!  This week we're challenging you to be inkspired by a fabulous photo.

Here's the inkspiration~

 

And my digital print~

I've used digital "paintings" found at Eclectic Anthology (our monthly sponsor) and elements and paper by Dusty Bear.  The font I used is called Jane Austen.

Sometimes we just need a little reminder that life is beautiful.  I think that we can all make this possible for those around us.  We can give a smile, send an email or card, make a phone call, help out with some small mundane daily task, the list goes on and on!  Each small act of service not only brings beauty to the lives of those we serve, but it also helps US to find beauty every single day.  So, what will you do today to beautify our world?  

Thanks for stopping by to take a peek at my digital artwork!  I hope that you join us this week for a fabulous challenge! If you'd like an non watermarked version of this print, please email me and I will send you one to use FOR PERSONAL USE ONLY.  HUGS and happy creat{ink}! :)

Trials of Faith

Well, it's been a little while since I last posted a General Conference quote and I think I'd better hurry up or else I won't have them all posted before April's conference rolls around, lol! ;)

Here's the print~

So, today I'm sharing thoughts about "Trial of Your Faith" by Elder Neil L. Andersen.  This talk really struck me as I read it and I think that today is the perfect day to talk about it because I've had "one of those" weeks.  We all have them, but let me give you some background.

Some facts you need to know to understand where I'm coming from that contributed to my mini trial of faith:
1. My husband and I have been struggling with infertility for about 7 years.
2. We are in the process of getting out of debt after a fraud hit our bank account a few years ago.
3. I have been suffering this week from severe insomnia and haven't had much sleep.
4. I work in a high stress job with children who are severely mentally disabled.  LOVE them, just a very hard (but very rewarding) job.

Okay, so now that you know those four things, let me tell you about my week/the past few months.  My husband and I started discussing our desire to be temple workers about 18 months ago.  We prayed about it and felt that it would be a good decision, but I was taking fertility medication to help us get pregnant and so my hormones and blood sugar levels were being messed with.  We decided that I needed to go off the medication so that we could proceed with our plan, but it was hard to give up the thought that maybe we'd get pregnant.  Finally, in September 2012, I went off the medication and we decided that perhaps we are not meant to be parents of our own children in this life.  It was a very hard decision and sometimes I still wonder if we are doing the right thing and second guess it, so that stress is always present in my life.

A few weeks after ending the medication and after we had discussed the idea again, a sweet sister in our ward, who also works at the temple, came up to me after sacrament meeting and told me that she had an application for us to fill out and an invitation from the temple president to become temple workers.  I am not a sign seeker, but if there is a clearer sign that we were on the right track, I can't think of one!

So, we set up an appointment with our bishop.  He's only been bishop for one week and had only been in the ward for about two months.  All three of us had no clue what we were doing, but we got it together and were able to proceed to the next step--an interview with the stake president.  That would prove to be easier said than done...

After trying to get an appointment for about 3 months, we finally were able to see the stake president a couple of weeks ago and he told us that he would send the paper work on to the temple.  We were excited and a little bit apprehensive.

Fast forward one more week.  That would be this past week.  I had been having severe insomnia issues and other emotional issues dealing with our infertility issues and was also incredibly stressed out with work.  We hadn't heard back from the temple president and so I tearfully told my husband that maybe this was a sign that we shouldn't be temple workers.  He reassured me that we were trying to do something good and that he would call to see what was going on.  We were planning on going to the temple tomorrow (Saturday) because it is our ward temple day, but my husband had promised to help clean the building.

So, my husband worked it out that we would be able to make it in time for one session if he went early with another brother in our ward and did some cleaning earlier.  He also called the temple and was told that we would be set apart when we came down for our ward temple day.  To say I was overwhelmed is an understatement.  I had been toying with the idea of not going because I have had literally about only 4 hours of sleep a night plus work and other things that I've had to do.  I told my husband that I thought we were making a mistake.  He reassured me that we were not and that every little thing would be taken care of.

It was.  I was finally able to get a full night's sleep last night, wake up and get all I needed to done and MORE, plus I am actually very excited to go down and be set apart as a temple worker with my husband tomorrow. 

Some other blessings that have helped me this week as I've gone through my mini trial of faith:
1. We found out that our tax return would be enough for us to pay off the debt that occurred when then fraud hit our bank account.
2. Because of the debt being paid off, I will be able to quit at the end of the school year so that we can serve more in the temple.
3. I was able to finally sleep last night.  I know I already said it, but seriously, this REALLY helped me.
4. We were able to have the missionaries in our home for dinner.  I don't know why, but this always makes me happier.
5. Each person that I've had to explain about our new calling has been so incredibly excited for us.

So, dear sisters (and brothers), I have had my testimony strengthened not only by personal experience this week, but also by the words of our living prophets.  I feel so blessed that I could just burst into song!  Except that each time I do, I find myself crying with joy.  What a blessing the gospel is in my life!

Please feel free to save the print above and use it for PERSONAL USE ONLY.  Other disclaimers and printing policies can be found in the tab up top.  HUGS and happy printing, friends! :)

Just checking in with some thoughts...

I had a dear friend send me an article today via email that I needed!  I'll get to that, but THANK YOU to my sweet friend--she always knows just what I need. :)

I was just called yesterday to be the Compassionate Service Coordinator in my ward and I feel very overwhelmed and very inadequate.  For those of you not familiar with LDS jargon, the Compassionate Service Coordinator works with our local leaders to meet needs of members--such as meals when a baby is born or there is an illness, housecleaning when there is a long term issue, or child care when LIFE happens.  I see that the Lord has been preparing me for this calling, but I couldn't sleep last night because I felt very upset.

You see, I had a dinner party planned for tonight to celebrate the 200th anniversary of "Pride & Prejudice" being published or whatever.  I LOVE Jane Austen.  I have some very good friends who also do, so I invited a few people over to celebrate.  Yes, I know it's supposed to be Family Home Evening, but I just really felt I needed to do this.

Okay, so I was feeling guilty about this because there are some needs I am taking care of for families in the ward and I felt that I needed to drop my personal life and dive into my calling and go visit some sisters that I think need some love and support.  I almost cancelled the dinner.  I'm glad I didn't.

One of the friends who came is not a member of the Church and I wanted to introduce her to other members.  She is amazing and I know that the gospel can help her and her family be together forever.  Plus, she brought her adorable daughter! Yet I still felt guilty even after everyone had gone home. And then the email came.

The article in this email was about how we as women sometimes feel that we don't deserve "me" time because we have families and responsibilities that we need to attend to.  The author says we should cut ourselves some slack--we should feel good when we do the everyday things because some people don't even do that!  When we need to spend time on one thing instead of another and we truly feel it's the right thing to do, we shouldn't beat ourselves up!  We second guess ourselves far too often...

Why would I feel that my original prompting to have a gathering of friends and fellowship with them was any less important than visiting the other sisters?  Isn't tomorrow another day?  I can do the things I was prompted to do tomorrow and it will still mean something.  I know that what I prepared tonight was something that has the potential to make lives better.  That is a worthy goal!

We need to trust ourselves more.  If we are living the kind of life that God would have us live, He will guide us to do HIS will and then we won't need to worry!  I have time tomorrow after work to make a visit.  I will do it--and it will be okay that it didn't happen right the very second I felt I had to.  When you trust God, you can truly trust yourself because your desires are in the right place.

I think this calling will definitely help me trust in the Lord AND myself more.  I am scared to death.  I would've chosen something quite different if it was up to me.  It wasn't.  I'm glad--I'm sure I'll be even more glad at the end of this calling.  Happiness is so wonderful! :)

Please feel free to use my printable for PERSONAL USE ONLY.  For more information on my disclaimers and printing policies, please visit the tab up top! :)  Happy printing, friends!

Linking to:

Journey Ramblings

Do you like the title?  It's a kind of warning to you all--I am writing this for personal reasons and it is going to get rambly and has the potential to offend.  It's me, after all!  Know that if you are reading this that I harbor no ill will towards anyone at this time and that all this genuine.  Also, this post is not going to show up on my Facebook page because I don't want people to think I'm writing to show people how "good" I think I am.  Because the only goodness I have is from God.  To HIM be all the glory.  I'm also not writing to blame or to point fingers.  No names will be mentioned in this post.  If you think you resemble these situations, perhaps it is coincidental and you shouldn't feel offended.  I'm writing this for ME.  I'm writing to remind myself NEVER to go back to where I was but to keep going forward to stay happy like I am now.

So, what did I want to write?  I want to write about how I have become happier than I have ever felt in the face of adversity and about things staying the same that I want to change while things that I wanted to stay the same changing.  Maybe that makes sense, maybe not, but that's the best way I could say it...

Anyway, there's part of the rambling, lol!  I am recovering from my first ever bout of "inactivity" that included not attending all my church meetings.  That is NOT me.  I'm serious.  Even if I've been inactive in the sense that I have plateaued and need to do better or fall back, I have NEVER purposefully not gone to church.  I did this for about seven months from August 2011 to February 2012.  I only attended sacrament meeting.  Sometimes I stayed for Sunday School, but only about two times that whole time period.  And nobody really noticed. Except my dearest friend and husband.  This is not me, as I stated before.  I have always enjoyed serving at church and especially as a visiting teacher.  I never stopped my visiting teaching--I am so glad it never got that bad.

I thought it was GREAT at first because I could study my lessons and learn by myself without those strange comments that people make that made me go "WHAT?!" in my head, and I'm sure on my face.  It happens to the best of us.  Sometimes we just make those comments, you know?  It was so much easier than sitting in class with a bunch of people who didn't even notice when I wasn't there, too.  Then I could be justified in my feelings of hatred.  Anyway, I did study my lessons and things for the first bit but then I just stopped.  I never stopped reading my scriptures and praying, just doing the other things that I knew I needed to do.

Why did I come back?  Well, I will tell you that it was for sure NOT because someone reached out and tried to help me come back.  Seriously.  Not one person really ever asked where I was or called to check up on me.  Or if they did, I am not aware of it or I was so selfish that I willed not to remember it because I wanted to be justified.  I had asked to not have visiting teachers because I have only had one sister come regularly the entire 5 years we had been in this ward and I was sick of feeling like I was not important.  I would rather know that someone wasn't coming because I personally asked them not to than to know it was because I was not important enough to pick up a phone to call.  Ever felt that way?  I bet you have. 

I bet you've also felt like I did when I cried out to God and asked Him if it could all just end because I was SO weary.  Not just tired.  Not just sad.  WEARY.  Soul crushing, head splitting, tear falling weariness that was only increased because of the sad choice that I had made to withdraw myself.  That's who really was to blame--me.

It's easy to say, "Well she should have called me" or "They should have noticed" or "He is the problem."  It's easy to think that nobody will miss you when it's been supported by the actions of those around you.  She probably "should have" called me.  But she didn't.  Doesn't excuse you.  They probably "should have" noticed.  But they didn't  Doesn't excuse you.  He might be PART of the "problem."  So what?  Doesn't excuse you.

I'm glad that nobody reached out (that I remember or am aware of--certain people did when I came back and that's usually how it goes).  Heavenly Father knew I needed to do this ALONE.  Because I'm a very strong-willed prideful daughter and He needed me to be humbled.  I thank Him for this.  It is a great blessing to me now.  Also, I realize now that people gave me space because that's what my actions had told them I wanted.  So who's to blame now?  Yep.  ME.

I also just want to put in a disclaimer really quickly--YOU SHOULD NEVER try to tell someone that they are the problem or that they need to change.  Unless you are a family member or a leader that can lovingly express the concern, you should NEVER try to convince someone that they are the problem.  Because you might be part of the problem and your trying to convince someone that they are the problem makes the problem bigger.  Speaking from an experience of a dear sister and friend of mine.  This situation really isn't me, it's someone else.  Why am I trying to convince you?!  It doesn't matter if you believe me or not, lol!  Anyway, my sweet sister and friend is sick of "being the problem."  WAKE UP you guys!  Fix your own self!  Look at me being all hypocritical in a sense.  But seriously, we need to take care of ourselves first.  Please.  Don't tell someone that they are a "problem." Each of us is needed and should feel only LOVE from us, not that we are a "problem."  Myself included, let's stop pointing fingers and fix our own selves.  We all know that we have so much to work on.  That's enough to take upon ourselves to "fix."  Fix you.  That's my goal.

I bet you're wondering why I'm telling you this.  It's because I realize now that the problem was ME.  It DOES NOT MATTER who didn't notice that I wasn't there because even though my husband did, there were others who also noticed but could not tell me because I had distanced myself from them purposefully.  God noticed.  My Savior noticed.  My family and friends who have passed on noticed.  It was because of them that I went back.  Seriously--you're thinking I'm incredibly crazy.  I kind of am...

The choice to go back was extremely hard.  I put it off month after month until one night I was laying in bed listening to my husband sleep.  I realized that if I didn't come back to church that our relationship would end when we left this life.  God only keeps covenants with us when we keep our end of the bargain.  I wasn't.  I also realized that if I didn't go back, I would NEVER see my friends and family that had passed on.  I wouldn't see my parents EVER again.  I would be alone.  I had thought that this was what I wanted.  I was stupid to believe that this choice only effected me.  It effected millions of people--some I don't even know right now.

And what about the children that we have tearfully prayed for and been anxious for?  What would have happened if we had them and I didn't feel the need to take them to church?  Our family was doomed.  Literally.  Everything rested on my one decision to go back to church.  And since I don't like to be called a wimp, I did.  With a bad attitude.

I started to help my husband teach his Primary class one week when his teaching partner hadn't shown up.  I was on medication that made it really hard for me to be restricted when I ate, drank, and went to the bathroom.  When I was asked to team teach Primary with my husband, I didn't want to do it.  I used the medication as an excuse to have to "think about it."  After a month, I grudgingly accepted.

I had a blast with the kids in our class.  But only during class time.  I found myself completely overwhelmed when we were in sharing/singing time because things were chaotic.  I am an educator by trade, and the way the children were allowed to act seriously shocked, scared, and saddened me.  I let it eat at me.  I tried to help in my way, but nothing changed.  I asked to be released shortly after school was back in session because I felt that I just could NOT handle that stress and the stress that accompanies the beginning of the school year when working with children who have severe mental disabilities.  Now I realize that this sad choice has actually become a positive turning point.  I love how God can do that for us when we finally want to sincerely repent.

The week after I was released, I seriously thought that I would start just going home after Sacrament Meeting again.  And then I remembered that sweet night when the sound of my amazing husband's breathing led me to realize the true desperation of my situation.  What did I value?  I had asked to be released of my own free will and choice.  It was MY decision.  That decision meant that I now had to attend Sunday School (that's fine) and Relief Society (UGH).  Yes, I used to hate going to Relief Society.  Not any more.

I went to Sunday School.  I almost left afterwards to go home.  I FORCED myself to stay put and sit all alone and feel miserable.  It was MY fault.  I didn't even say hi to anyone even though a few sisters did come and approach me.  I was cold, distant, and slightly rude.  I had more miles to go before happiness could show its face in my life again.

So, when did it?  When I decided that I needed to serve again.  Not in a calling, but just because that is part of the covenant I made with my Father when I was baptized.  I promised to serve those around me and to love those around me.  There were no exclusions clauses in this covenant.  It wasn't to serve and love those around me IF they loved me and served me the way I thought they should.  It wasn't to serve and love those around me IF I liked them and they were "my type of people."  It wasn't to serve and love those around me IF they didn't "use" me for my talents and then ignore me everywhere else.  It wasn't to serve and love those around me IF they were nice to me.  The covenant I made was to serve and love those around me.  PERIOD.  By the way, I do not have a calling right now (aside from being a visiting teacher) and I think that I am okay with this.  Which is also not me.  I like to be in charge...I'm working on this.

I am so glad for a few things that happened while all of this was going on.  Firstly, I got a new visiting teaching companion.  I was unhappy about it at the time because I felt that it was done to spite me and to tear me away from some very good friends.  I see now that God can be in everything that is done even if it is done for the wrong reason, or rather, what I consider to be the wrong reason.  We eventually got an route that included two sisters who are new to our ward.  Very great blessing in deed.

That is another thing I am happy for is that many new sisters and their families moved into the ward.  I reached out to them in hopes that they would have heard nothing about me and would not judge me.  Isn't that selfish?  But you know what, it lead to service for the right reason--because I love them and I want them to gain eternal happiness.  This then lead me to want to reach out to all the other sisters and their families in our ward (that I felt had wronged me, perhaps they "have" but that is no good excuse for MY behavior) because when you serve, you are filled with the love of Christ and it GROWS.  It is so wonderful!

A third thing that I am happy for is a pregnancy "scare" that turned out to be just that--a "scare."  Every October around General Conference time, I get seriously depressed because I am not pregnant and that means that I am not good enough to have children, right?  And then I don't watch General Conference because I am angry at God.  But this past October, I missed my period.  I was so excited to think we would FINALLY have a pregnancy and I just KNEW that this one would not end in miscarriage.  I was never pregnant, but I watched all of General Conference because I wasn't depressed and didn't know any differently.  And when my period came in November, I was okay with it because Heavenly Father had allowed me to feel of His love through situations that could be considered "sad."  As I type this, I am realizing that "sad" experiences can make us very happy.  Because happiness is a choice.  Having no children is bearable knowing that if I strive to keep my covenants they will come in another life.  This satisfies my hunger for motherhood in the traditional sense.

The last thing I am grateful for is all the babies being born to my friends and sisters right now.  Isn't that a crazy thing for me to be grateful for after what I just told you?  I'm grateful for it because for the FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, I not only attended my first baby shower--I THREW IT.  I threw a baby shower because I am no longer bitter that I may never be a mother in the traditional sense this life.  I am not even "resigned" to it.  I am embracing it!

I can do SO many things that mothers of small children cannot.  I can serve them.  At a moment's notice.  I can stop what I'm doing and GO when I need to.  When that prompting comes, I can act on it without having to find a babysitter.  My husband and I can babysit for a couple with young children so that they can go a date night when they can't afford a babysitter because, in reality, any night can be date night for us.  We can help families out by watching their children for them so they can attend to other obligations.  In that we are fulfilling our role of parenthood.  We still love and seek out the Primary children even though we both no longer serve as Primary workers.  They can in a sense be our children because we taught them and can show them kindness each week we see them and listen to them and laugh and be happy because of their sweet spirits.  We can have them in our home and feel of their perfection as we play and have fun with them.

God is SO good and SO great.  He is a perfect Father with a perfect love for His imperfect daughter.  He knew how to humble her so that she could find peace and happiness.

I now can truly say with certainty and integrity that I do love all those around me.  That doesn't mean I don't get annoyed by peoples' actions or even make judgements at a split second when I hear, read, see, or am told about things.  I am working on this.  I am working on forgiving not only things people have done to me, but forgiving people of things they might do.  It also doesn't mean that everyone will believe me or think me genuine.  I might seem fake to some.  I get it.  Because I've felt the same way before.  Because we are ALL human.  That means I must try harder and smarter--I need to get on my knees and pray to know what I need to do to make this situation better.

We are all a family.  And we ALL have issues.  And we can make allowances for others.  We should make allowances for others.  Then God can make allowances for us.  And we can be happy.  We should and can choose to be happy.

Happy NOW.

Happy in the face of adversity--whether self inflicted or placed upon us because we must learn something.

Happy our whole lives.

Happy for ETERNITY.

Through the Atonement of our Savior and the mercy of a kind and loving Father in Heaven, we can be families for eternity.  We can live in love and unity.  But it takes each of us being willing to do this.  One person can't do it alone.  A few people can't start a group to "make" it happen.  We each must use our agency to create it.  And it starts in our homes.

I am SO thankful for my husband who will never stop loving and supporting me, for my parents who taught me from a young age the truth of the restored gospel, for my righteous and enduring family and friends on the other side of the veil.  Without them, I wouldn't be where I am.  I would be in my own realm of misery that I had started creating for myself or else dead.  I am not kidding about that.  I am especially thankful for the Atonement of our Savior that I have been able to utilize and KNOW I will be utilizing for the rest of my life and for a loving Father in Heaven who perfectly knows and loves me and allows me to fail so that I can learn.

I will not be allowing comments on this post.  Please feel free to email me if you wish to.  I will do my best to get back to you. :) 

Regrets

I know that we all have regrets from our life time.  Okay, I know that I do.  I can't speak for you.  Elder Uchtdorf's talk really hit home for me and I realized that living with regrets should be something that teaches you to be better.  We should learn from our mistakes and not continually make the same ones over and over thinking we can just repent each time.  Repentance is sincere change, not feeling sorry for a bit then going and performing the same sinful act again. 

I LOVE this statement that Elder Uchtdorf makes~

Isn't that simple perfection?  It's so easy.  Living the gospel can be SO EASY!

I was talking to my husband recently about how I am trying to do better at treating others the way the Savior would.  After one such incident, he told me that he was proud of me for trying to work with difficult people.  You know what I told him--because this is what I had realized--I am the only one being difficult. 

I am the one who decides how difficult to make a situation.  I am the only one who makes myself sad.  I am the only one who can make me happy.  I am the only one who can choose to rise above whatever I perceive is going on and choose to treat others as children of God anyway. 

This attitude shift has really effected my life and has made me so incredibly happy.  I hope that as we continue on the path set out by our Savior that we will see an increase in our happiness and peace.  I know that we will find both if we are doing all we can to live a righteous life.  I also know that when we follow the Savior, we will be able to live a regret free life and return spotless to our heavenly home.

Please feel free to use my print FOR PERSONAL USE ONLY.  More disclaimers and policies about printing can be found under the tab above.  Happy printing! :)  And stay tuned...there are more General Conference prints to come! :)

Know it, Love it, Live it!

I'm back!  Sorry for the long delay, I'm trying to sort out my life after my laptop died! ;)

I'm sure that this is probably one of the most loved quotes from this past General Conference, and so I wanted to do something a bit different.  I wanted to go elegant and just make the statements bold as a reminder to myself to BE this each and every day!

Here's the print~

And here's a little something else for you if you want--if you email me at onastampage@yahoo.com and tell me what color you'd like instead of the yellow green I used, I will personalize this for you!  

I hope that you find this printable inspiring!  Please feel free to use this for PERSONAL USE ONLY.  Thanks, and happy printing! :)

Teaching Tykes: I Can Be A Good Example PLUS A Tip on Gospel Teaching in the Home

Well, I will be gone for two weeks and therefore will not be teaching, but I will still post the helps, etc.! :)  I've also been asked by a reader to talk about some ways to make teaching the gospel a main focus in our homes and so I will be including one tip each week that will hopefully help you in your homes as well as a teacher.

We'll start with the tip (it goes along with this week's lesson, too)--ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING.  Scripture reference to go along with this teaching tip is from the Doctrine & Covenants.  In section 58 verse 27 we learn that, "...men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness..."  When you look up the foot not for anxiously, the word that is at the end of the list to look up is zeal.  When we are truly living the gospel, we have a zeal for it!  We are excited to live the gospel!  When our children see that gospel living makes us happy and that we want to do it, they will follow our examples.  On the other hand, if you are constantly overwhelmed and upset about the work that you have been given/chosen to do, this is how your children will act.  Now, if you need to talk to someone about the load you bear, your spouse is there.  But never complain in front of the children.  And YOU need to do what is right for your family.  If you are truly overwhelmed, tell your Father in Heaven and follow His guidance as to what to do about it.  Choices effect your attitude and ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING!  This is the first step to making gospel teaching the center of your home.

Let Your Light Shine!

Isn't this darling?!  Find it here or use the coloring page in the helps!

Now, onto the lesson!  It's Primary 2: Lesson 29: I Can Be a Good Example.  I'll just get straight to how I'd teach the lesson as I've already talked about what our example should be for those we teach above. ;)  Find the helps HERE.

*I would bring a real candle and a battery operated candle to show the children that even when the battery powered candle is on, you can't see it under the basket.

*Instead of paper candles, I would use birthday candles with the names on tags and a blank one for each child in my class.  I would put them into a pot with foam in it and have each child take out the two in front (with the names on them) first and tell the stories.  These candles would have a different colored tag than the blank tagged candles.  Then after the stories, I'd hand each one out of the pot--the one with their name on it--and keep the one with my name on it and have them read the names one by one.  I would have each child say one thing they could do to be a good example.

*The coloring page would be the candle image in my helps.

*I would do Enrichment Activities 2 & 4 if there was left over time.

I hope this post helps you!  Good luck, please email me if you have any questions and THANK YOU for all your kind comments and amazing feedback--you make my blogging so worthwhile and I LOVE it! :)

Things on Thursday: NEVER Give Up!

So, the past few weeks at Word Art Wednesday, they haven't had scriptures--instead, it's been inspiring quotes!  And this week is one of my absolute favorite quotes!

Here's my printable~

Isn't that an amazing quote?!  It so simple and succinct.  And so needful!  We live in a world where people give up too quickly.  To many children are ending their life because of things that they think are too hard to endure.  Adults are tuning out from family responsibilities because it wasn't the "happily ever after" they were wanting and looking for.  The lonely are tired and weary from having no support and decide not to try anymore.  I think that we forget to have hope at times.  Life will NEVER be prefect, but there is ALWAYS hope.  I truly believe that there is nothing we can do that will make God stop loving us.  And that love can give us hope for a better future.  And hope makes it easier to endure to the end and never give up.  Christ is always there.  Never forget that, and NEVER give up.

"Let Israel hope in the Lord from henceforth and for ever."

Psalm 131:3

Welcoming Womanhood: Self Worth vs. Self Esteem

Hello, girls! This is the first post in a series that I will be doing that focuses on issues that effect women.  Sometimes it will be as simple as an easy meal--we ALL need those!  Other times, I'll write my opinion about topics that effect each of us.  Oh, and I'll back it up with gospel teachings, too! ;)

This week, I have chosen to write about the difference between self worth and self esteem.  I'm sure some of you are probably thinking that I am splitting hairs, but I promise that I am not and that I have a point, so bear with me! :)

The world teaches women to have what they call "self esteem."  This means that women should put themselves above others and take care of themselves.  They should be skinny, well coiffed, and always speak their mind--it's their right!  That each woman is more important than those around her and should treat others this way--they should KNOW that, too!  In essence, it's modern feminism in action.  I won't be going into the reasons I believe modern feminism to be wrong.  Indeed, I believe that much of the early feminist movement was necessary for the progression of God's daughters.  But I won't go into negative thoughts.  Instead, I'd like to focus on the important opposite of self esteem--self worth.

"Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God."
Doctrine & Covenants 18:10

Self worth is based on the knowledge and understanding that we are daughters of a loving Father in Heaven.  It is rooted in the comfort that comes from the perfect love of God.  It allows for imperfection--as long as we are striving to do our absolute best.  It doesn't care what brand of makeup you wear, who made your jeans, or what make and model your car is.  Self worth is based on charity, which is the pure love of Christ.

It is interesting to me that the first lines in both the Young Women theme and the Relief Society declaration are based on the knowledge that we are literally children of God.  The Young Women theme starts, "We are daughters of our Heavenly Father, who loves us, and we love Him."  The Relief Society declaration declares, "We are beloved spirit daughters of God, and our lives have meaning, purpose, and direction." 

What do these two sentences teach us?  There is the obvious--that we are daughters of God.  That He loves us.  But look at the small differences.  The Young Women are taught that they should love God as well as know that He loves them.  I feel that this was essential to put in the Young Women theme--our knowledge that God loves us can only be felt as truth when we love Him in return.  Youth is a time to realize this, but it doesn't mean that each of us has a firm foundation of this truth as we enter Relief Society at the age of 18.

We will each have to come and know that our feelings of love FROM God come when we show Him that we love Him.  This comes as we serve in our callings to the best of the ability.  It eradicates feelings of inadequacy as we come to realize that our service may not be perfect, but that it is pleasing to the Lord.

President Thomas S. Monson has spoken on this subject and said, "We have the hands to lift others from complacency and inactivity. We have the hearts to serve faithfully in our...callings and thereby inspire others to walk on higher ground and to avoid the swamps of sin which threaten to engulf so many. The worth of souls is indeed great in the sight of God. Ours is the precious privilege, armed with this knowledge, to make a difference in the lives of others."

Notice that President Monson never once mentions the word PERFECT.  He mentions the words faithfully, inspire, higher ground.  Never perfect--because that only comes after years of working on all the other principles he mentioned.  Do your best--the Lord will make up the rest!

After we have felt of God's love by showing our love for Him, we will be able to come to a greater understanding of the end of the first sentence of the Relief Society declaration, that is to know that "our lives have meaning, purpose, and direction." 

We learn in the scriptures that "...this life is the time for men to prepare to meet God; yea, behold the day of this life is the day for men to perform their labors." (Alma 34:32)  So what does this mean to YOU.  I'm not going to tell you what this "means", because this is a very personal thing.  It is our job, as individuals, to come to understand exactly what direction our life needs to take.  Luckily, we have people that can help us, but ultimately, the decision is ours to make.  

Now, I do have a little bit of a caution for you.  If you choose to just "go with the flow" and allow things to happen to you instead of taking responsibility and action as to what you need to do, you are in danger of perishing spiritually.  In Proverbs 29:18 we read, "Where there is no law, the people perish..."  There are two ways that this verse could be taken (or maybe more, but I'll talk about two).  The first is that without a living prophet who speaks with God, the people do not have a constant source of "living water" and therefore they spiritually perish.  The other way is how we can cause ourselves to personally perish spiritually.  When you lose the vision of what your goal is--hopefully, it's eternal life--then you lose hope and start to fall into a state of personal apostasy.  This means taking time for yourself each day to replenish your personal spiritual reserve.

Elder M. Russell Ballard has given some wonderful counsel to us, as women, in how to cultivate meaning, purpose, and direction in our lives as well as in how to replenish your personal spiritual reserve.  He said, "Sisters, find some time for yourself to cultivate your gifts and interests. Pick one or two things that you would like to learn or do that will enrich your life, and make time for them. Water cannot be drawn from an empty well and if you are not setting aside a little time for what replenishes you, you will have less and less to give to others, even to your children. Avoid any kind of substance abuse, mistakenly thinking that it will help you accomplish more. And don't allow yourself to be caught up in the time-wasting, mind-numbing things like television soap operas or surfing the Internet. Turn to the Lord in faith, and you will know what to do and how to do it."

What a wonderful blessing we have in the living prophet and apostle of our Lord!  It is my prayer that each of us will come to a greater understanding of our worth as daughters of God, that we will choose to participate in activities that will lift ourselves and others, and that we will awake each day to a greater resolve to stand for what is right.  I hope that you know that Heavenly Father loves you and needs you--how do you do this?  You'll have to find out for yourself!  Please take a little time each day to find out how you can do this.  Have a wonderful day!

Linking to: Titus 2sdays, Women Living Well

Thursday Things: His Eye is On the Sparrow

Well hello there!  Welcome to my first ever Thursday Things post!  In case that phrase is a little lost on you, please check out THIS POST for more information!  So, what to do for the first ever Thursday Things?  I dunno, how about another entry into this week's Word Art Wednesday?!  I used some of my winnings from the challenge--beautiful artwork prints from Eclectic Anthology!  They are such a blessing in my crafting! :)

Here's my printable~

There are many times in each of our lives that we will feel insignificant.  I have these times.  Quite a bit, actually.  You know what?  There is always one person who knows exactly what we are going through.  Because He suffered for me personally and has experienced all my sin, pains, sickness, and sadness.  That is our Savior.

Because of His Atonement, each of us has the ability to feel of God's love and know that He is aware of us always.  Although my church does not sing this song, it is incredibly inspirational and I love the words, especially the refrain.

I sing because I’m happy,
I sing because I’m free,
For His eye is on the sparrow,
And I know He watches me.

I love music.  I grew up in a very musical family and have been blessed with the talent of musicality.  I find that when I seriously consider the words that are being sung in each hymn and song that speaks of Christ that I can find peace and comfort.  I am so grateful for the gift of music!

I hope that each of you can find peace in the words of Christ and in the words of inspirational music.  God bless and I hope to see you again soon!