A New Heart

I don't know about you, but there are times when I feel incredibly strong in my testimony of the gospel and other times when I question what I believe in.  The scriptures call these times "trials of faith."  I used to wonder WHY God would give us these times in our lives.  I used to be angry during these times.  It's only been recently that I have decided to embrace these "trials of faith" and learn and grow from them.

A few weeks back, a good friend of mine asked me to watch her three little ones this week because her regular babysitter is on vacation.  I told her I would, thinking that the money would be welcome since I'm not working at all this summer.  But then I started to realize exactly what I had agreed to. 

My only experience with motherhood has been either a miscarried pregnancy or else a foster placement.  Foster care was a severe "trial of faith."  I never want to do it again.  It has nothing to do with the children that we took care of--I will ALWAYS love them.  It has to do with other things that I just typed and then deleted.  I'm trying to be more positive about it. 

Anyway, we'll just say that foster care left me a panic filled, paranoid, wreck of a severely distrusting person.  I never wanted to take care of kids or even think about trying to have them again.  I seriously felt that motherhood was NOT for me.  And on Monday night it hit me that I would have children in my home again.  And I seriously FREAKED OUT.  I felt sick to my stomach, couldn't eat or focus, and wanted to call and cancel.  BUT, I remembered my resolve to embrace things that were difficult with me, said a prayer, and went to bed at nine.  It was the right thing to do.

Friends, these past two days have been two of the best days of my life!  I loved the kids I'm watching before I offered to do this, but now I love them even more!  I have seen what motherhood really can be and it is not as scary as I thought it would be.  Granted, I've only done this for 2 days and I KNOW it gets worse after the "honeymoon" period.  But I have proven to myself that I could stay calm and collected.  The kids still love me.  I adore them!  This has by far been the most amazing "trial of faith" that I have ever gone through!  And all because I put my trust in God.  And He took my hardened heart and showed me that I could have a different heart that would do more good for the world.

Doesn't that story go along PERFECTLY with the scripture at Word Art Wednesday?!  I was amazed when I saw this week's challenge--and I am sooooo amazed at the goodness and greatness of God!

Here's my digital print for today~

AND, a recipe that I came up with for the kiddos--they LOVED them!

Homemade Oreo Cakesters

1 Devil's Food cake mix
2 eggs
1/3 cup oil
1 container marshmallow fluff

Mix the first three ingredients, roll into small balls (about 1 inch in diameter) and bake for 8-10 minutes at 350*. When they come out of the oven, flatten the cookies slightly with a spatula. After the cookies cool completely, add marshmallow fluff to the bottom of one, and add another cookie on top!

Easy peasy, and OH SO YUMMY!!! :)  Sorry there isn't a photo...they were THAT GOOD. ;D

In addition to Word Art Wednesday, I'm linking up to Scripture Sunday @ Each Card Tells a Story, Think on These Things, Titus 2sdays, and Tell Me a Story.  I hope you all have a fabulous rest of your week--feel free to use my digital print for PERSONAL use!