Here's the print~
Some facts you need to know to understand where I'm coming from that contributed to my mini trial of faith:
1. My husband and I have been struggling with infertility for about 7 years.
2. We are in the process of getting out of debt after a fraud hit our bank account a few years ago.
3. I have been suffering this week from severe insomnia and haven't had much sleep.
4. I work in a high stress job with children who are severely mentally disabled. LOVE them, just a very hard (but very rewarding) job.
Okay, so now that you know those four things, let me tell you about my week/the past few months. My husband and I started discussing our desire to be temple workers about 18 months ago. We prayed about it and felt that it would be a good decision, but I was taking fertility medication to help us get pregnant and so my hormones and blood sugar levels were being messed with. We decided that I needed to go off the medication so that we could proceed with our plan, but it was hard to give up the thought that maybe we'd get pregnant. Finally, in September 2012, I went off the medication and we decided that perhaps we are not meant to be parents of our own children in this life. It was a very hard decision and sometimes I still wonder if we are doing the right thing and second guess it, so that stress is always present in my life.
A few weeks after ending the medication and after we had discussed the idea again, a sweet sister in our ward, who also works at the temple, came up to me after sacrament meeting and told me that she had an application for us to fill out and an invitation from the temple president to become temple workers. I am not a sign seeker, but if there is a clearer sign that we were on the right track, I can't think of one!
So, we set up an appointment with our bishop. He's only been bishop for one week and had only been in the ward for about two months. All three of us had no clue what we were doing, but we got it together and were able to proceed to the next step--an interview with the stake president. That would prove to be easier said than done...
After trying to get an appointment for about 3 months, we finally were able to see the stake president a couple of weeks ago and he told us that he would send the paper work on to the temple. We were excited and a little bit apprehensive.
Fast forward one more week. That would be this past week. I had been having severe insomnia issues and other emotional issues dealing with our infertility issues and was also incredibly stressed out with work. We hadn't heard back from the temple president and so I tearfully told my husband that maybe this was a sign that we shouldn't be temple workers. He reassured me that we were trying to do something good and that he would call to see what was going on. We were planning on going to the temple tomorrow (Saturday) because it is our ward temple day, but my husband had promised to help clean the building.
So, my husband worked it out that we would be able to make it in time for one session if he went early with another brother in our ward and did some cleaning earlier. He also called the temple and was told that we would be set apart when we came down for our ward temple day. To say I was overwhelmed is an understatement. I had been toying with the idea of not going because I have had literally about only 4 hours of sleep a night plus work and other things that I've had to do. I told my husband that I thought we were making a mistake. He reassured me that we were not and that every little thing would be taken care of.
It was. I was finally able to get a full night's sleep last night, wake up and get all I needed to done and MORE, plus I am actually very excited to go down and be set apart as a temple worker with my husband tomorrow.
Some other blessings that have helped me this week as I've gone through my mini trial of faith:
1. We found out that our tax return would be enough for us to pay off the debt that occurred when then fraud hit our bank account.
2. Because of the debt being paid off, I will be able to quit at the end of the school year so that we can serve more in the temple.
3. I was able to finally sleep last night. I know I already said it, but seriously, this REALLY helped me.
4. We were able to have the missionaries in our home for dinner. I don't know why, but this always makes me happier.
5. Each person that I've had to explain about our new calling has been so incredibly excited for us.
So, dear sisters (and brothers), I have had my testimony strengthened not only by personal experience this week, but also by the words of our living prophets. I feel so blessed that I could just burst into song! Except that each time I do, I find myself crying with joy. What a blessing the gospel is in my life!
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